Being alone & being left alone are different things

Today I spent most of my day alone.  I could have gone up to work, but there weren’t really any orders in and my laptop decided to not turn on yesterday, or today, and I can’t fix it right now, so I stayed home.  My fiancée still had to go to work, so I was left alone.  However, being alone and being left alone are different things.  Let me explain…

To be alone is to just that simple.  No one is around.  You are alone.  I’m alright with this most of the time, as long as it is of my own choice.  If I chose to remove myself from the company of others, I’m fine.

To be left alone is when others chose to not interact with you.  When that happens, I fall into depression.  I don’t like summers half the time because I am not around as many people daily.  I enjoy my work as a photographer because I get to interact with the public (even when they annoy me).  I enjoy my school because it is so small that I know at least half the people I pass in the halls.

Today, once I made the decision to stay home and not drive the 40 minutes to work, that decision to not interact with the two or three other people at work today, I actually started to relax.  For some reason, that’s just the way my mind works.

Side note: I’m sorry I didn’t write the past few days. My co-workers and I took a day to actually visit the park we work out and ride the rides and have lots of fun. However, that lots of fun is very tiring and I fell asleep early again.

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